By Sebastian Sansoni and Devmal Palapathwala
The multitude of Thomians who pass in and out of College are offered a rich experience that irrevocably affects their lives for the better. We are guaranteed to be influenced drastically primarily because of the values and principles we inherit which are then dutifully handed down to the next generation, “untarnished and unimpaired.” The success of our individual development is therefore owed to the service of those who felt morally obliged to give back to College, the great lessons that College taught them. Many an Editor before us have identified this charge and have since lent themselves to the duty of imparting words worthy of the didactic traditions of College. Nevertheless, our thoughts and moods can fall on archaic values which render our Thomian community regressive. In this light, we hope, not to regurgitate ethics we love at heart and dismiss in practice, but to stress certain unwritten codes that must ignite our collective consciousness for the sake of our greater society.
The way our society has treated and continues to treat women is appalling to say the least. Cultural, religious and classist forces have systematically defined and undermined the role of women as second-class citizens that must carry out certain and fulfil certain expectations. Although progress has been made – we often boast of having elected the first female Prime Minister in the world – it far too little and painstakingly sluggish. Antipathy, ignorance, obstinate harshness and prejudice underlie much of the treatment women face. We cannot speak whole-heartedly and completely for the struggles that women undergo. Our inability to truly empathise does not however prevent us from sympathising and advocating a greater understanding. It is a commitment to understanding what women go through daily and allowing yourself to be shaped by that newfound truth which matters.
The few instances of misogyny and oppression we relate are not wholly representative of the vast array of insults and harassments that women face in Sri Lanka. There will always be voices unheard and crimes unspoken but that should not dissuade us from relating the little that we know. From our personal lives, we know that oppression runs rampant on the streets. These range from the annoyingly committed stares to the unbearably vulgar hoots and comments. “Cat-calling” is horrible because it is an unwelcome invasion that exploits and exposes a woman on a sexual level. Thus, some women refuse to walk at all, some are forced to take more expensive transport, and most are in a perpetual state of discomfort that floods into the more important aspects of their lives, be it work or study.
“Locker room talk” is far more common than men would like to admit. Women are quickly objectified and dehumanised by boys without reproach as their protected bubbles allow the cycle of comments to be sustained. It is not enough that the comments go away once female company arrives, it is not enough that respect exists only when that person is there. Prejudiced thoughts should not be manifested in words or actions even by the most inclusive of men, as they add and bleed into the greater fabric of society, perpetuating toxic ideas that poison the status of women further.
It would be untrue and unashamedly arrogant to assume that Thomians haven’t been guilty of being sexist or misogynistic. Some of the young speak badly, treat repressively and act arrogantly. The old too are guilty of committing much of the same with image-sharing on class groups being disgustingly common. One might have hoped that maturity would have taken over their better sense. Yet, not all are to be blamed, and not all of us are too old to attempt to learn and relate.
Unfortunately, women and girls have become increasingly vulnerable as attacks take an unprecedented shape in the form of cyber-bullying and cyber-exploitation. Now prejudice and misogyny are given a platform that allows perpetrators to hide behind a veil of anonymity, which facilitate further attacks as multiple victims are singled out. How the internet should be used and what limitations will be enforced, either by ourselves or by law, are yet to be clearly defined. Its scope is colossal and the speed at which content is shared is blistering. We must be sensitive to the content we choose to share, ignore and delete. The recent Dropbox incident where many institutions stepped in to investigate and educate, serves as a good example of cyber-responsibility.
The importance of making our friends feel comfortable around us cannot be overstressed. Girls who are forced to be submissive in so many instances should be free to be themselves among friends that they trust. We shouldn’t be quick to judge or question who they wish to be when around familiar company especially, when it is an environment they consider open to unhinged expression.
Although our tone may appear harsh it doesn’t belie the fact that the values that teach us how to treat people are learnt at this very institution. The great name of the College that we cherish so much should not be used and sullied by those whose values are congested in double standards. Inherent to our Thomian ethos is a distaste for laziness, craving for knowledge, yearning for justice and equal treatment of all. We deservedly boast that within the school equality transcends race, religion, cast or creed and this principle has governed many Thomians who transplanted these values to their life outside of school.
Having not possessed a certain demographic in school, it can be easy to forget that equality and justice transcends sex as well. Nevertheless, Thomians are products of their school environment. Much social change and progression was nurtured in the liberal framework that embodies College, making our greater Sri Lankan environment a product of us. It is about time that women felt that way about society too and be given an equal chance to change it.
Esto-Perpetua
The Co-Editors
(This editorial first appeared in the S. Thomas’s Annual Magazine and has been republished here with the permission of the authors and school authorities)